The Broomcupboard

LIKE A SMALL CHILD IN A SWEET SHOP

Words cannot express our excitement, because we've been invited to spend the afternoon behind the scenes at CBBC next week. We hope we'll be able to bring you a fascinating report afterwards - though in the interests of not getting fired, we'll probably not be revealing any trade secrets or anything.
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BLUE PETER DOES THE GAMES

This is the best idea kids' TV has had in ages. Ostensibly this programme is Blue Peter: The Champions, but for everyone else this is the joyous piece of bandwagon-hopping that is The Games: Juniors.

The highlight so far has been watching Kirsten O'Brien engage in the welly-throwing event, and looking supremely pleased with her result. The downside is that they appear to have filmed it on a cold and windy day, therefore not giving us the opportunity to ogle Abs and Simon Thomas in tight shorts and singlets.

If you missed it tonight, make sure you catch the repeat on BBC Two tomorrow at 7.30am tomorrow.

Incidentally, this is neither whimsical nor irreverent, but it needs to be pointed out that Andrew Hayden-Smith is wearing camouflage trousers today, and that really has been very pleasant.
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THE SHAPE OF SATURDAY MORNING TO COME

And so it's come to this. Dick and Dom have left the building, and there's an all-new Saturday morning line up on BBC One. We're hugely happy to see The Saturday Show coming back because of our mildly unhealthy fixation with all things Simon Grant-related, but we have to express our concern at the messing with a winning formula.

All magazine shows stand or fall on the strength of the chemistry between the two presenters, and the chemistry that the presenters offer to the camera. Compare Live & Kicking as hosted by Andi and Emma or Zoe and Jamie to Live & Kicking hosted by Steve Wilson and Emma Ledden. Indeed, does anyone remember the latter two? Probably not. They were sweet, polite, pretty and competent presenters, but the spark just wasn't there. Saturday morning TV needs that small undertone of anarchy, whether it's provided by Andi and Emma's willingness to ritually humilate themselves on television on a weekly basis, or the inference that Zoe and Jamie went out and got bladdered the night before and presented the show mildly hungover. Not forgetting Ant and Dec, of course, who really reminded us just how much you can get away with on a Saturday morning.

So it is with great distress that we come to report the departure of Fearne Cotton from The Saturday Show, for we feel that the chemistry between her and Simon was a large contributing factor in the success of the previous series. They worked well together, and came across like the best mates of your older brother or sister - the ones who mucked around with you and made bogey jokes, but it was still okay to fancy them. The new team for Saturday mornings will be Angellica Bell, Simon Grant (hooray!) and Jake Humphrey, and we wait with baited breath to see how they work out. Angellica might be okay, but we're not particularly impressed with the choice of Jake, considering that he runs dangerously close to Wilson/Ledden bland-and-not-really-that-fanciable territory. Not to mention the fact that he looks like a startled faun most of the time he's on camera.

We're rather more excited by the prospect of The Mysti Show, which will premiere on Saturday at 10am. It stars the eponymous Mysti, a sassy fairy who decides she wants her own television show and so promptly magics one up for herself, along with quirky cohorts and celebrity guests. We like what we've seen of the trailers (although we blame this show entirely for the fact that we've been walking around singing McFly's '5 Colours In Her Hair' for the past week) and are quite hopeful that this might prove to be the funky noughties answer to Parallel 9, which we always rather loved. The producers describe it as "Buffy meets Sabrina" (hmmm, we're not quite convinced by that one) and the ever-reliable Radio Times describes it as "a 20-minute funky teen comedy drama that's integrated into a 40-minute live magazine show" - a lot like Parallel 9, then.

And of course at 11am, there'll be the one and only Top of the Pops Saturday, mercifully still hosted by the lovely Fearne (note to Fearne Cotton - sort your hair out, luv). Oceans better than its risible Friday night big brother (note to Andi Peters - Tim Kash really isn't working out, is he?), we're very happy that this seems to be a mainstay of Saturday mornings these days, especially now that Cat Deeley is wearing her welcome remarkably thin over on CD:UK.

We're rather looking forward to Saturday morning in light of all this. We weren't especially big fans of Dick and Dom, and Ministry of Mayhem over on ITV is just a pale imitation of SM:TV, the lovely Holly Willoughby being the only thing going for it. Looks like things just got interesting.
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OBITUARY: CARON KEATING

The Broomcupboard was very sad this morning to learn of the tragic death of one of our childhood heroines, Blue Peter's Caron Keating. We don't know how we could even hope to properly eulogise someone who shaped our childhood in so many positive ways, so we will simply say that she will be missed, and we hope that there will be a part of the Blue Peter garden that will forever be Caron Keating. Our thoughts and best wishes go out to her friends and family.

Full story from BBC News Online here.
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THIS WEEK'S PDA (PERSON DESERVING OF APPRECIATION

Oooo. Who she? She Anne Foy, that’s who she.
And she is…? One of the quarrelsome quartet that make up the regular cast of CBBC’s Stitch Up.
What does she do? Alongside her cohorts Callum, Simon and Marvyn, Anne sets up unsuspecting members of the public to be humiliated for the benefit of the cameras. We had our doubts that Trigger Happy Juniors would work, but thanks to the ambitious yet family-friendly set pieces, and the considerable talents of Ms Foy (who acts the rest of the cast right off the screen), it rates 4/5 on the Entertainometer.
I’m going to need an example. I thought you might. This was a highlight from a show broadcast last week. Anne goes undercover as a checkout girl and distracts an attractive young customer by commenting on his pleasant accent and enquiring where he’s from. Whilst doing this, she manages not to let him notice that she has scanned the loaf of bread he gave her eleven times, and, with a patented Anne Foy Look Of Wide-Eyed Innocence charges him £10.50 for it, much to his bemusement.
You’ve sold me. Where can I catch it for myself? Stitch Up’s half-term run continues this week on BBC Two from Tuesday to Friday at 8:20am. It’s worth setting your alarm just to witness the brilliance of Anne first-hand.
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MEDIA REPORT: WEDNESDAY 7th APRIL 2004

Do not worry about the youth of today. They have not been corrupted into imbecility by Teletubbies. They have not been turned into bibbling simpletons by Boohbah. They have not been turned into violent sociopaths by Tom and Jerry, and they have not been turned into chart-topping pop combos by Miami 7.

Actually, I have no idea if that's true. I have no scientific proof that "the kids are all right". They could all be little bastards, for all I know. Little pikeys doing wheelies outside Tesco and throwing Chupa Chups at sweet little old ladies. My (misplaced?) faith in The Kids stems from my knowledge of their viewing habits.

According to Broadcast magazine, the second most-watched children's television programme on terrestrial television in the week ending 14th March was: The Fairly Odd Parents! Hurrah! The kids have taste! Whether they're watching it for the subversive humour that knocks spots off Friends these days (as I do), or whether they're watching it because it's shiny, colourful and loud, I have no idea. It's being watched, that's all I care about. As long as it's being watched, it'll stay on our screens. For anyone who was wondering, the programme in the top spot was The Story of Tracy Beaker, and I'm fine with the Odd Parents losing out to the Beaker, because she's tops as well.

Then again, this magnificent news pales in comparison to the news that Andrew Hayden-Smith is wearing a pink belt today.
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WATCH THIS SPACE

Coming soon to this very corner of the web is The Broomcupboard, the blog with no fear of immaturity, and is never reluctant to read deep homoerotic subtexts into Blue Peter.
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